Effective Networking Questions and Frameworks to Further Enhance Your Prowess (networking series 4/4)

While the last article focused on how to network effectively, in this installment of our networking series, we delve into the art of small talk and conversational building techniques and talk tracks to prepare for many networking situations.

Small Talk, Big Impact

Many people downplay small talk as a conversation about less important things, often between people who do not know each other well.  They trivialize it as surface speak and a time waster.  Whether you love or hate it, it might be more important than you think.  We mainly do it to scan for topics to find common ground and develop initial rapport.  Factual questions such as where you grew up, what you do for fun, or what your family is like allow you to build trust and invite others to go deeper.  However, if you are lazy by just speaking about one thing, casually rambling, and asking close-ended questions, you will make people want to walk away from the conversation because it is boring.   Examples include, do you like the conference?  When is your flight home? If your energy is low, you show the person that you are not into it, and nobody wants that kind of small and low-energy talk.

Topics for Meaningful Conversations: Building Your Toolbox

Here's a curated list of conversation starters and follow-up questions to guide your interactions and keep conversations flowing naturally:

·      Location.  Where are you based / where is home for you?  What is the most interesting thing about your town/city?  What do you like best or least about where you live?  Have you ever considered living in another place?  If they are not from the area they grew up, you can ask what they miss most about home?  How did you like growing up there?  Where did you grow up? How is it different than where you live now?

·      Company Experience.  What was your journey through the company?  If they are new to the company, you can ask, what did you do beforehand, and what attracted you here?  Which mentors or leadership have been most influential in your growth?

·      Career.  How did you get into your career?  Is it much different than what you wanted to do when you were younger?  What did you study in school, and how did you decide to study that?  What do you love about your career?  What’s most exciting about your industry right now?  What do you think about doing next in your career?

·      Travel.  Have you had the opportunity to do some summer (or whatever season) travel yet?  Do you have any upcoming travel?  What do you like to do or where do you like to eat when you visit this city?

·      Food and Drink.  What are you drinking?  What restaurants would you recommend?  What is the signature dish you like to order?

·      Sports.  What team are you rooting for this year?  How did you get into being a fan of this team?

·      Hobbies.  What do you like to do for fun?  What’s been energizing you personally lately?  What are some of the things you have been passionate about lately?  What keeps you busy outside of work?  What are you reading/ watching/ listening to right now that is worth checking out?

·      General.  What have been some highs and lows for you this year / recently?  How do you like spending your weekends?

Common Scenarios and Approaches: Tailoring Your Conversations

1. Following Up After an Online Event.  You can reach out to the Speaker or Attendee:

·      Send a message on Linkedin with a note.  “I enjoyed your talk, especially the point you made about…. Sometimes speakers make a comment that they do not feel is significant, but if it stuck with you for whatever reason, tell them why; it is helpful to know that.

·      I appreciated the information/comment you shared; I work in a similar space and would love to connect to chat with you about x. Can I send an email to set up some time to connect?

·      Your talk/comment was insightful.  I’ve been in the space for a few years and would love to hear about how you overcame the challenge of…

2. Logging on to Zoom before the meeting begins:

·      Where are you based?  If they bring up something in the news, you can follow up on that.  For example, I hear there is more snow than usual in your area, is that affecting you?

·      How is the weather near you?  Is that common for this time of year?

·      What are you all looking forward to this week/month/season? 

3. In-person conferences:

·      You can ask about what their favorite session was so far. You can ask a follow-up to discover what they learned from it or why it stuck with them.  If that was also your favorite, you could discuss the concepts more deeply.

·      If they traveled from another city, you could ask where they are coming from, how their flight was, and what is one of the first places they are excited to visit while they are here.

4. Networking Events

·      How do you know the event organizer?  How did you hear about this event?  What brought you here tonight? What are you hoping to get out of this event?

·      Have you come to one of these before, and if so, what stood out for you?

5. Asking Somebody to Coffee

·      I heard how well your presentation went to the executive board.  Can I take you to coffee and learn about what you’ve done in this aspect?  

·      Everybody is talking about what you did with this customer and this project I’d love to learn more.

6. Requesting Introductions

·      You can say, “Who do you know in this organization who is a great teacher or doing an excellent job that you think would be valuable to connect with?”

7. Here is a framework for approaching informational interviews within your company to learn about other opportunities and possibly change teams

·      Introductions

o   Give your pitch & general information about yourself (what excites you and what are your goals)

o   Find out about the person, their team, structure/composition, goals.

·      Uncover more details.

o   Ask specifically about the things you are interested in.  How does your team experience career development?  How does your team advance diversity efforts?

·      Express interest and have an ask.

o   I am interested in what you said about the work your team is doing and the culture you create, I’d love to stay connected.  What is the best way to learn about new or upcoming roles?

o   If you need assistance; I’d be happy to take on an assignment (if you have the capacity, this is an opportunity for you to stretch your experience and learn more about the team.)

o   Is there anybody else you think would be valuable to connect with about this topic / about x, y, or z topic.

8. Here is a framework for developing more robust cross-functional / stakeholder meetings, especially if you just joined the company and are in your 30-day Listening Tour

·      Small talks

o   How did you get to where you are?

o   Where did you grow up, where do you live, and what do you like about where you live?

o   What do you like to do outside of work?

·      Introductions

o   Share your story and hear theirs

·      Function-related questions. 

o High-level questions to help understand the vision and strategy and find areas to connect

o   Specific questions to understand the engineering, data, product, or processes better

·       Team Structure

o   How is your team structured?

o   Who is outsourced, and who is not?  How do you pull in resources?

o   How do they perform compared to other top teams, and what contributes to their success

·       Future direction/alignment

o   Where do you see this product going/ what is the alignment?

·       Ways of working.

o   What is the best way for us to work together going forward?

o   What’s the best cadence for us to connect?

By mastering effective networking questions and conversation frameworks, you can elevate your networking approach and unlock many opportunities.  Every interaction is a chance to forge meaningful connections and cultivate valuable relationships that can propel your personal and professional growth.

Quote of the day: "Opportunities do not float like clouds in the sky. They're attached to people. If you're looking for an opportunity, you're really looking for a person." - Reid Hoffman.

Question:   What’s one of the best questions you have been asked that allowed for a deeper connection?  Comment and share below; we’d love to hear from you!

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with leaders to strengthen their internal and external networking approaches for win-win opportunities, contact me to explore this topic further.

What questions do you ask for networking success?

Elevating Your Networking Game: Best Practices and Proven Methods (networking series 3/4)

Whether you're a seasoned professional or just starting your career path, mastering these networking techniques can propel you toward your goals with confidence and purpose.

Before Networking Beings: Prepare for Success:

1. Craft Your Elevator Pitch.  The question, “What do you do,” is one that many dread because they do not like talking about themselves or are not sure how to do it effectively.  Instead of responding with your profession, “I’m a Product Engineer,” you can talk about the problem you solve or the passion that drives you before sharing your role.  You should deliver it succinctly in less than 90 seconds and choose a starting point that resonates with your audience's interests.

1A. Start with the Problem.  For example, “Most small businesses fail; I am a VP at X company focused on helping budding entrepreneurs be successful. I teach them to write impactful business plans, perfect their pitches, and get seed funding so they can beat the odds and live their dream as a business owner depositing positive impact.”

1B. Start with Passion.  Share your enthusiasm for your work and its impact.  For example, “I live to make other people successful.  As a Communication Coach, I help business leaders with their executive presence so they are noticed in the boardroom, inspirational speeches so they can empower their teams to do great things, and influencing skills to better collaborate with their stakeholders to get work done.  If you wanted to start with your role before sharing your passion, you could say, “As a Sr. Director of Member Experiences, I am passionate about championing technology to solve business problems and creating delightful customer experiences.  One product I helped to create recently positively impacted customers as they were able to… .”

2. Define your Current Networking Goal.  Clarify your objectives, whether finding a mentor, advancing your career, growing your business, or building a professional support network.  Understanding what success looks like enables you to network with intention. 

3. Identify Key Contacts.  If you are attending a big event, it can be overwhelming not to have a plan.  However, if you can access the invite list and research and target individuals who align with your goals before attending, that can be effective. You can even email them in advance about your excitement in connecting.   This proactive approach will save time and energy, especially for introverts who can quickly get drained.  Instead of being exhausted by a 2–3-hour event, if you have met your goal and had three meaningful connections, you can leave after 40 minutes to not get burned out by the experience.  While this is just a tentative plan, if you meet people who are not on your list and the interaction is fruitful, you can also consider that a success. 

4. Prepare Your Ask.   If an opportunity presents itself, for example, they say, “I love what you are trying to do; how can I help you?”  It would be a missed chance if you had nothing meaningful to ask.  You may want an introduction with their peer or an opportunity to connect again to learn about their career journey because you want to make a similar shift.  When in doubt, asking for learning and connection opportunities is always good.

5. Define your Offer.  Consider 1-3 things you can offer in case they need assistance.  It is essential to understand your time constraints so you can provide an appropriate offer with the allotted time you have to spare.  

5. Create a List of questions.  Prepare a few engaging questions to facilitate meaningful conversations.  Having them ready in advance alleviates the pressure and fosters genuine interactions.  This will be the focus of the next article.

6. Craft Short stories.  You can prepare 1-2 interesting anecdotes to captivate your audience and illustrate your experiences.   You can reuse the same tales in different settings, and as you continue to network, you can gain inspiration to create more based on what others share so you can enhance your repertoire.

During Networking: Navigating Conversations with Finesse

1. Ask Thoughtful Questions.  It is refreshing to get asked questions that are not frequently asked.  Instead of doing what others do by asking typical inquiries such as, “What do you do,” you can encourage meaningful dialogue, “What’s your favorite part of your work?  “What’s been energizing you personally and professionally this month?  What’s the last thing you learned?"  What’s one way you hope to grow this year?”  You can lead the way by responding first to foster authentic exchanges.

2. Demonstrate Active Listening Skills.  Dale Carnegie says to be interested rather than interesting.  The sentiment concerns allowing others to talk, not just dominating the conversation.  When you listen to people, you are not cued up with the next thing to say; instead, you are picking up on something important and asking follow-up questions.  It is always helpful to listen to what they value or to the bigger picture and give them opportunities to talk more about that.

3. Find shared interests.  Find common ground to establish rapport and deepen connection.  They may mention that they just returned from traveling to a city and you had a fantastic experience there.  You can share a memorable restaurant and discover your love of food or the beauty of the city.  Small talk can lead to significant discoveries and lay the foundation for meaningful relationships.  For example, you learn it always snows where they live and ask how they take advantage of that weather.  They respond with their passion for skiing, which you happen to share, you will have much to explore on that topic.  Or that they live in a town with popular sports teams, and you can connect over that.

4. Offer Appropriate Vulnerability.  Share relatable anecdotes or experiences.  There is a phenomenon called the Beautiful Mess Effect, put forth by a team of psychologists writing in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, which states that contrary to our worst fears, having the courage to show our vulnerabilities is often rewarded and viewed more favorably by others.  When sharing a time that you screwed up in a low-risk way or something similar can breed trust and strengthen the relationship.

Post-Networking: Sustaining and Nurturing Connection

1. Send Follow-up Messages.  Reach out to those you connected with, expressing gratitude and suggesting future interactions.  For example, “It was great meeting you. I enjoyed what you said about X, and I’d love to connect again; you mentioned you would be at the X conference in 2 months; maybe we can grab lunch there?  If you do not have an event coming up, consider following up every few months.  Building networks, while important, never feels urgent, and when you consistently reach out, you lay the foundation to develop strong relationships long before you might need anything. 

2. Reach Out to Missed Connections.  Do not hesitate to contact individuals you intended to meet but did not have the chance to connect with.  Express your interest in engaging further and propose alternative meeting options.  For example, “I attended this event and was looking forward to chatting with you because of your work in this area; I’d still love a chance to connect via Zoom or set up a coffee chat.  Please let me know if a time window might work best for your schedule; I am happy to accommodate whatever might work for you.”

3. Maintain a Tracker.  Keep a record of your networking interactions, including dates, where you met them, topics discussed, and follow-up actions such as when you would like to connect next and over what topic.  If you are finding interesting articles that they may enjoy, you can send them to keep the connection alive, but be sure to personalize the message and be thoughtful about what you are sending.  I know you said you were traveling to Belgium next month. I came across this interesting article about this new exhibit that opened, and I thought you might enjoy it given your love of art.

Record your networking interactions, including dates, topics discussed, and follow-up actions.  Regularly update and review your tracker to stay on top of your networking efforts.

By implementing these strategies, you can navigate networking with confidence and purpose, unlocking numerous opportunities along the way.  Networking is not just about making connections—it's about cultivating meaningful relationships that can enrich your personal and professional life.

Quote of the day: “Your network is your net worth.” -Peter Gale

Question:  What’s your best networking strategy?  Comment and share below; we’d love to hear from you!

The final blog in this series 4/4 will focus on effective networking questions and frameworks.

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with leaders to strengthen their internal and external networking approaches for win-win opportunities. Contact me to explore this topic further.

How do you network effectively?

Navigating Networks: Exploring the Pathways to Professional Success (networking series 2/4)

Building on the previous article focused on the challenges and benefits of networking, this article delves into the diverse types of networks available to assist you in achieving your goals.

Let’s explore three types:

1. Internal Network.  In your workplace, if you are a part of a small team at a medium to large company, you may only spend time with your manager, direct reports, and peers you collaborate with.   Engaging with people in different parts of the company is helpful to broaden your understanding of the business and uncover potential collaborative opportunities.  These relationships usually do not happen organically, they must be intentionally cultivated.  When you go to a company event, do not just gravitate to the people you already know, set a goal to get to know a few people you have never spoken to and start building those relationship.

2. External Network.  These avenues offer opportunities to connect beyond the confines of your workplace.  Executives are likelier to build connections through conferences, events, and cross-industry professional networking groups.  Managers and directors are more likely to develop their networks through past and current colleagues.  Let’s take a look at a few:

2A. Industry Conferences.  These are places to connect with people in your same industry.  For example, you may attend SHRM (Society of Human Resource Management), one of the world’s largest conferences for HR professionals to learn about industry trends.

2B.  Role/Function Conferences.  These events attract people in your same position.  For example, you may attend ProductCon, the world’s largest conference that takes place 4x a year and gathers people from around the world in this Product Manager or adjacent roles to explore the hottest topics in the space.

2C. Mixed Conferences or Professional Organizations. These conferences usually have a blend of people from different roles and industries. For example, Chief is one of the largest professional female Organizations that brings together C-Level and Vice President leaders in various companies in various roles to empower great leaders. As an Executive Coach and Group Facilitator at this organization, many women have expressed to me how incredibly valuable it has been personally and professionally to tackle similar challenges.

2D. Skill-Based Networking.   You can take classes, certifications, or workshops to strengthen your abilities.  That is usually a great place to meet people because you already have similar interests and can create a relationship as a learning partner.

3. Social Networking.  In addition to professional settings, social gatherings, and community activities also serve as networking opportunities.  Join local meetups, volunteer organizations, and Facebook groups, or engage in neighborhood activities to connect with individuals with common interests.  These interactions, while primarily personal, can offer unexpected professional benefits. 

4. Existing Personal Network.  Reconnect with individuals from your past, including former classmates, coworkers, and neighbors.  These "weak ties" can prove invaluable in connecting you with new opportunities and resources.  Don't underestimate the power of rekindling old connections.

By understanding the diverse landscapes of networking, you can strategically navigate the process and leverage each network's unique benefits.

Quote of the day: "Succeeding in business is all about making the right connections." - Richard Branson

Question:  Which unexpected place did you have success with networking?  Comment and share below; we’d love to hear from you!

The next blog in this series, 3/4, will focus on how to network effectively.

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with leaders to strengthen their internal and external networking approaches for win-win opportunities. Contact me to explore this topic further.

Where do you prefer to network?

Mastering Networking: Overcoming Challenges, Embracing Benefits (networking series 1/4)

Networking is a vital facet of one's professional journey.  It stands as a crucial bridge between opportunities, connections, and growth.   Despite its undeniable importance, networking remains a daunting and even disliked endeavor for many.  This paradox highlights the need for a deeper understanding of networking's nuances, strategies, and the potential it holds for personal and professional development.

What Networking Is Not

Some people have an aversion to networking because it conjures up slick, self-interested, manipulative tactics to get things you may not deserve.  It is not just about pitching, selling, delivering long speeches, and aiming to close business on the spot.  It is not a hyper-focus on you and what you are trying to do.  It is not about hassling people or using them to get something you want done.  It’s undoubtedly not transactional. These are all descriptions of when networking is done wrong. 

Defining What Networking Is

Genuine networking is the act of building and maintaining mutually beneficial relationships.  When done well, the goal is to advance your career or business and to provide help for others for collective benefit.  London Business School Professor Herminia Ibarra says networking or creating a fabric of personal contacts to provide support, feedback, insight, and resources is essential for every manager.  Many people think they must network when ready to job hunt, but it is about the long game – building authentic connections that can bear fruit down the line.  It’s a chance to have flourishing relationships and tap into insights and resources from a trusted group. 

Challenges in Networking

Herminia Ibarra Highlights Challenges that Executives Face:

1. Reluctance to Ask for Help.  As an accomplished, high achiever, it can feel hard to ask for assistance.  You may have gotten good at self-reliance and think you can rely on your strength to pull you through the way you have done your whole life.  While people underestimate other’s willingness to help, multiple studies confirm that most of us like to assist.  We are social creatures, and it’s one of those things that make us feel good.  When you practice the activity, especially in low-risk situations, and start to see some results, your comfort with asking for help will grow. 

2. Prioritizing Secrecy.  Some people want to reach out to others but do not want them to know they are job searching or unhappy in their current position.  They are also worried that the word will get out, which could jeopardize their current position, especially with industries or roles with smaller circles or in communities where everybody knows one another.  One of my clients was looking to switch positions, which would involve a move, and she was waiting to talk to her children because she worried that they would tell their best friends who have parents who work at the same place and are connected to other community members, which would get back to her boss.

In situations where people have been laid off, some feel embarrassed to share, however there are ways you can take command of the narrative.  If you were a part of a more massive layoff or your role got eliminated, these things happen, especially the higher up you go as the company goes in a different direction.  If you feel like there are too many systemic issues preventing your success, you can share what you are moving toward rather than what you are moving away from.  If you do not share with others, you lose the potential of connecting with somebody who can help you.  Finding a new position can take a long time, so instead of guarding your intentions too closely and stressing about the process, you can suspend your pride and put yourself in a position to forge a valuable connection. 

3. Unrealistic Expectations.  When we get to higher executive levels of our career, it can take as little as three months and as long as 18 months to find the right fit.  You may have amassed an incredible resume and would be an asset to any company, but there may not be an available role.  Networking can take a long time to learn about potential future roles.  You may meet one person who might share an opening for a VP role four months from now when this leader is planning on retiring and their successor recently left to take a position elsewhere, so there is no leading internal candidate.  If we are changing industries or careers, it will take a while to strengthen our skillsets and figure out what we might want to do and that will entail a lot of conversations that will provide helpful clues as you travel on your path of what you could want next.  Patience is key, as connections can lead to opportunities when you least expect them.

4. Not Wanting to Put in the Work.  It takes time to have a lot of conversations with people and be intentional about attending events.  The dedication required is often on top of a full-time job so you can imagine it being a draining experience.  What compounds the problem is that most people have not invested in their network, so they can feel like they are starting from zero.  They could think 2-3 connection points are needed before they ask about something they want, and with busy executives, those meetings can take many months to set up.  If you have already laid the foundation to build a strong network and are clear on your goals, that process can be shortened.

Herminia Ibarra recommends listing up to 100 contacts, former employers, clients, and customers and writing down the names of the people you met in those roles.  There will be some people on that list who will be information givers who can tell you about the market, companies, and hiring trends and some who will be door openers who will vouch for you and introduce you to decision makers because you have worked with them in the past or have a strong connection.  By being organized with how you keep track of your connections, the work you are putting in can bear greater fruit.

5. Overly Focusing on the Narrative.  Many people spend a lot of time talking about themselves without getting to the heart of forming a mutually beneficial relationship.  They do not have a clear ask or they do not learn what the other person is interested in to find those win-win opportunities.  Spending too much time talking about why you are unhappy or the past rather than talking about what excites you and what you are moving toward.  The best practice is to be direct, concise, positive, and future-oriented.

6. Failing to tailor your story.  People spend so much time perfecting their elevator speech and using the same one on multiple audiences rather than customizing it.  A talk track can be divided into parts, and while some pieces can remain the same, especially in terms of what you are passionate about or the problems you are eager to solve, you want to customize other sections depending on your audience that will resonate the most.

Benefits of Networking

1. Building Good Relationships.  You create trust and strengthen connections by offering assistance and valuable resources while expecting nothing in return.  Cultivating those genuine interactions, expanding common interests, and feeling like you have a support team that you can go to for career and life advice will add significantly to your happiness.  Psychotherapist Esther Perel said, “The quality of our relationships determines the quality of our lives.”                      

2. Advancing your career.  When it comes to career advancement, most people realize that sometimes it’s not always what you know, but who you know.”  One study found that more than 70% of Fortune 1000 CEOs, mostly white men said they have done business with someone they met on the golf course. Additionally, 80% of Fortune 500 executives said golf has helped their careers.  Another study shows that over 80% of women at and above management level said they have used networking relationships to join a board, break into the C-Suite, or accept a new job with better pay.  People do not hire resumes,  they recruit people they like, who are interesting, and interested in what you are saying because of their curiosity. 

Networking is a multifaceted endeavor with the potential to shape careers and lives positively.  By dispelling misconceptions, navigating challenges, and leveraging the benefits, individuals can harness the true power of networking. 

Quote of the day:  "The richest people in the world look for and build networks; everyone else looks for work." - Robert Kiyosaki

Question:   What’s your biggest challenge when it comes to networking?  Comment and share below; we’d love to hear from you!

The next blog in this series 2/4 will focus on types of networks and where to network.

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with leaders to strengthen their internal and external networking approaches for win-win opportunities, contact me to explore this topic further.

What’s your experience with networking?

Strategies for Reclaiming Recognition after a Credit Robbery (Taking Credit series 2/2)

In our previous article, we discussed the various scenarios where credit theft can rear its frustrating head. This article will empower you with practical strategies and helpful scripts for navigating and reclaiming credit in the workplace.

Strategies for Reclaiming Credit:

1. Correct the Record in Real Time. If somebody appropriates your idea in a meeting, take immediate action and assert your ownership.  Politely interject by saying, “"I'm glad you agree with the idea I shared earlier; I'd be happy to provide more insights into its development." Alternatively, you can thank the person for echoing your idea and elaborate on your thought process, “Thank you for pointing out my idea in a different way, here is what I was thinking when I came up with the idea…”  The goal is to regain control of the narratives and ensure people recognize you as the idea’s owner.  

1A. When your Colleagues Omitted your Credit.  Graciously acknowledge your coworker and highlight your own involvement: "Glad you liked the presentation. Sandra and I worked closely on this project, and she led the way on this aspect."

1B. When your Meeting has been Hijacked. When somebody takes over your meeting because they are leading a part of the workstream, while you are the overall owner, you can reclaim control by clarifying your role.  If the whole room starts following your peer Bob who has a minor role and he is becoming the point person for answering questions, you can say, “Let me jump in and answer this question.  When I started this project, here is the intention and the initial problem statement my team and I put together. I brought on additional stakeholders, including Bob who is running point on this channel but for questions on any of the other channels, I’d be happy to answer them.” Or you can say, “let’s take a moment to zoom out and think about the overall purpose of this project. Here is how I designed it…. and for questions relating to how all the pieces fit together, I’d love to address them before we drill down on one of the channels that you might have specific questions about.”

2. Encourage Peers to Set the Record Straight and Redirect Credit.  Peer intervention can be helpful.  They can clarify the situation by saying, "Just to clarify, Sue brought up this excellent idea ten minutes ago, and I thought it was fantastic.  Sue, could you provide more details about your proposal?"  In a December 2023 Republican debate, Vivek Ramasamy attacked Nikki Haley’s character by saying, “She has no idea what the names of those global provinces are but wants to send our people to go fight in those locations.” Chris Christie swiftly intervened and said, “he has insulted Niki Haley’s basic intelligence (she doesn’t know regions, she wouldn’t be able to find something on a map that his 3-year-old can find), and not her positions.  If you want to disagree on issues, that’s fine, and Nikki and I disagree, but I have known her for 12 years.  She is a smart, accomplished woman, and you should stop insulting her.”  Standing up for others can have a significant impact.

2A. Encourage your Boss to Correct the Record.  If somebody gave credit to somebody else and your boss jumps in to say, “I’m glad you appreciated the idea, but Jenna was the one who came up with it.  I’ll pass the floor to her for more insights.”  It makes a difference.  Be sure to thank them after the meeting or send an email letting them know how much it meant to you to support you in front of everybody.  You can also let them know you are proud to have a leader like them in the company because you make them even more aware of the behaviors they should continue.

2B. Use Amplification to Gain Allies.  This powerful strategy was employed at the Obama White House to ensure recognition of female staffers’ ideas.  When President Obama first took office, 2/3 of his senior staffers were men, and they noticed sometimes women would share their ideas, they would get overlooked, and then moments later, somebody else would share that same idea, and it would get acknowledged by others. To combat this, when female staffers made a noteworthy point, other women would echo their points.  This forced others to recognize their contribution and denied them the chance to claim the input as their own.  For example, if one woman shared an idea and it got lost, another woman would jump in and say, “I want to return us to Jill’s excellent point, here is what she said that was so valuable.”  As a result, President Obama started calling more on women and junior aides to voice their options and women gained more parity with men. 

This strategy has so many benefits.  Amplifiers usually go to the highest rungs of leadership because they are seen as competent and generous, and people want to be in the community with those individuals. We convey a kind of confident and generous leadership that attracts great people to our team.  We also increase our colleague’s sense of value, belonging, and connection to the company and its mission.  We increase positive perceptions of us by linking us in people’s minds to other successful people. We deepen our relationships with clients and create more opportunities to serve them. Adam Gran,t in his book Givers and Takes, talks about those who give away at every opportunity are the oneswhot rise.  You can even amplify people’s voices outside the company.  Invite experienced colleagues to join you on panels or feature your work in their series. 

2C. Believe in & Practice the Shine Theory.  This is where elevating others ultimately benefits you.   When you have privilege and power, you have a greater audience and are better positioned to help others by shining a light on their work.  Deloitte does a great job with this, they have their Conversation with Leaders Series where they showcase senior women on the front lines of the financial service industry through talks, articles, and podcasts. You can also connect colleagues with expertise to other people and opportunities to elevate their credibility. For example, “You mentioned driving innovation in this market, I was just talking to my colleague Beth who is the absolute authority on this topic, I’d love to connect you two.”

If you are in a meeting and there are lots of ideas, all swirl, but nobody is taking a stand, you can move the conversation along and give credit to others by saying, “Hearing everybody’s thoughts has been clarifying for me, here is what I think we should do to move forward.” You can even mention the few parts that stood out and shaped your thinking. These actions show humility, grace, and inclusion in your operations.

3. Set the Record Straight with Colleagues.   If you notice that you are in your boss’ shadows and they are taking credit for your work, you can shed light on your significant contributions to your peers.   Explain your thought process, involvement, and the efforts you and your team invested to drive that body of work.  For example, “When I came up with that idea, I was thinking of this challenge, so my team and I spent months developing an initial prototype before we started recruiting partners.  I am happy to share more about this technique and the broader finders with the team.”  Alternatively, “I was having a great conversation with the CTO when the idea came to me to try this approach.  My team immediately offered support, and here is how we went about it…”. You will be sending a clarifying message that you and your team are the owners of the idea.

3A. Correct the record with Peers in Writing.  If somebody posts on a Slack channel (e.g., your peer Beth) and assumes the credit for your work, you can jump in and gently correct any misattribution by saying, “I’m delighted to see my concept gain traction, we formed the perfect team utilizing Beth’s data expertise to achieve these results.”  Alternatively, “when I initially proposed the idea, it was because Beth inspired me, she immediately saw value in the concept and has been a great collaborator on this project.”  Or, “Thank you Beth for taking a leap on the idea when I pitched it and making it even greater; I could not have done this without your help.”

4. Correct Record with your Boss.  If you worked with John and he told your boss he did all the work, you can say, “I’m so happy you liked the idea, John and I spent hours brainstorming before we landed on the winning idea.” 

If your internal partners try to inaccurately include you in some work when you are not part of the job, you can also share that.  I had a client who was never consulted by her cross-functional partners when they put together a report to give to leadership team that provided key information on her team’s work.  Her peers misrepresented the situation to leadership and acted like they consulted her to give the report more credibility.  When she learned of what happened, she was frustrated because she had made several attempts to collaborate with those stakeholders and was blown off.  She went to her boss and shared, “I wanted you to know there is inaccurate information in that report because my team was never consulted, and I do not want that piece of work to represent my department. I tried to schedule a meeting multiple times with them, but they could never find time.”

5. Have Direct Conversations with Credit Usurpers. Engage in open conversation when you observe someone wrongly attributing your work.  Share your observations and ask for their perspective.  Seek clarity and agreement on how you both can present your contributions more accurately in the future. 

If your boss has taken your idea, you can share that one of your goals is to get visibility with senior leadership, so when you find out that your name was not attributed to the strategy, you are just curious to learn why.  Then, you can say, “Next time there is an opportunity, I’d love to present this body of work to raise my visibility; how does that sound to you?”  Or, “I’d love to own the part of the presentation based on the work I did; Would that be okay?” Get their commitment to you leading the work next time.  You cannot sit around to get opportunities; you have to proactively carve them out for yourself. 

Leadership Expert Liz Wiseman shares a story of when she was putting together a leadership program for new managers and part of that included a binder of materials.  When she was at a meeting with the team, her boss started going through the binder and talking about some of the materials, to Liz’s dismay.  So, she had a direct conversation with him.  She began with questions, “Whose idea was the binder?  Who did the work for it?  Who should be the one to present the binder?”  She shared that it may not have been his intention but when he shared the binder, it made it sound like he did all the work.  She knew she had to speak up because she did not want to establish a precedent that she would do the work and somebody else would take the credit. The boss responded, did not even realize what he had done, and was grateful for her to point it out.  Sometimes, these things will happen, and if it is an accident, after a conversation, there is a greater chance that the person will not do it again.

In other situations, credit theft is done intentionally.  I had a client whose boss once said, “I’m responsible for this team, so I will present the work.”  When that happens, you can say, “I understand that, and it is important to me that the work I do to advance our team is acknowledged.”  Or, “I know you are responsible for the overall project, and would love to present my piece which I dedicated countless hours to, would that be ok?”  

6. Address Mislabeling by Your Boss.  When another client of mine spoke up to get credit for her work, her boss responded, “you are too sensitive; don’t be territorial and not a team player.”  Just because the boss may have anchored a false perception, does not mean you have to take it at face value.  One approach with your boss is to get curious and inquire about their viewpoints and definitions of team players.  Say, “I’m curious, what do you view as a team player? “ Then you can share your approach to teamwork. “I view good teammates as not taking credit for other people’s work but giving credit where it is due.  It is a joy when I highlight others’ work, I love to give credit, here is how I recognized somebody on my team recently….”  Or, “When it comes to my take on teamwork, I take a lot of pride in my work and love to share it, the way I want my team members to share their work and not take credit.”  There is a space for recognizing both the individual and the team.

7. Highlight Unwanted Behavior.  In the example from the previous article, when the colleague introduced my client poorly to the CEO, you can directly talk with the person to clarify your role and importance.  Here are some scripts:

·       “I noticed when you introduced me to the CEO, you said this and neglected all these other things.  I wanted to take a moment to understand how you introduced me in a way that did not capture my bigger and more important role.”

·       "I appreciate the introduction, but I have a more significant role in this project than mentioned. Let me provide a broader perspective so my bio can be more accurately shared next time."

·       You can use the intent and impact framework – “It may not have been your intention to dimmish my role in your introduction, but I was left feeling confused to be described in a way that does not represent my full scope.  I’d love to learn more about that.” 

·       Be sure to share your expectations going forward.  “Let me take a moment to explain my role and provide context in what I bring to the table so you can accurately present my bio.” 

·       “Going forward, please introduce me this way or say this line and turn it over to me, and I’d be happy to share my bio that matches the work I’m doing around here.  Do you have any questions about that?” 

·       “You may not realize this, but I wanted to share with you my role so you can introduce me to people in her office going forward to capture the scope of work best adequately.”  

8. Limit Information Sharing Until Trust is Established.  As entrepreneurs, share information strategically.  Communicate at a high level with few details initially, reserving your unique story and messaging for when trust is firmly established.  While their message may try to be like yours, your authentic passion will be greatly felt more than somebody else’s superficial borrowing.  You can even talk to the person and let them know you were disappointed to see the information they presented without your consent.

These strategies help you navigate situations where your credit is misappropriated, ensuring your contributions are rightfully acknowledged.

Quote of the day: "Individual commitment to a group effort—that is what makes a team work, a company work, a society work, a civilization work." - Vince Lombardi

Question:  Which strategies have you found most effective in confronting others?  Comment and share below; we’d love to hear.

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with leaders to communicate effectively including strategically self-promoting; contact me to explore this topic further. 

What do you do when somebody takes credit?

Recognizing and Navigating Credit Theft in the Workplace (Taking Credit Series 1/2 )

Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you put in the hard work on a project, only for someone else to take credit for your efforts?  It's an unfortunate scenario that can be demoralizing, but there are effective strategies to set the record straight and address this issue.

This article will delve into common ways credit can be unjustly claimed, and the next one will explore strategies to respond effectively.

Common Scenarios of Credit Theft:

1. Peers who Share your Ideas.  Picture this scenario - you share your innovative ideas with peers, and they either remain silent or attempt to discourage you.  Later, in front of leadership, one of them presents your idea as their own, which is well-received, and they are now put in charge of the project.

2. Colleagues Omitting Credit for Your Work.  When collaborating on a project, a coworker presents to leadership and consistently uses "I" instead of "We" without mentioning your contributions.  It can be frustrating when you added just as much, if not more, and because they were the face of the project, they assumed all the credit, even if you were the more prominent behind-the-scenes player.

3. Boss is Taking Credit For Your Work.  Imagine spending weeks developing a strategy, only for your boss to present it to his leadership team as his own without acknowledging your contribution.  They were even on PTO during part or most of the planning process and were not really clued into all the details, yet they were the mouthpiece for the plan. What’s most egregious is that you only learned that they presented it as their own and gave you no credit when you had a conversation with his peer about getting promoted and they responded that you needed to strengthen your strategy-setting muscle.   You are baffled because you just built the whole strategy for the next year so you conclude that your name was not attached to your body of work.

Credit taken is quite common in politics.  Representative Pete Stauber voted against Biden’s bipartisan infrastructure bill in Nov. 2023.  Yet months later, in January 2024, he bragged how excited he was to have received funding for Minnesota’s 8th Congressional District to improve 29 airports without saying where the money had come from.  He aimed to take credit for other people’s hard work by bragging about something he was directly against.

4. Ideas Taken During Meetings.   You may start to share an idea in a meeting, only to have your audience initially overlook it.  Later, another person repackages and presents your idea as their own, receiving a positive response from the attendees.  Something similar to this situation happened recently with one of my clients; she was the idea’s originator and brought in partners along the way for others to pitch in on small areas when needed. During one meeting, when she was presenting, one of the partners spoke up and added information and ended up assuming control of the meeting because all the future questions were directed to him.  He provided the answers like he had been working on it from the beginning, even though he led only a small part and was not the overseer and was brought in well after the projects started.

5. Appropriation in Professional Networks.  Entrepreneurs and independent contractors may face this in a professional network group that aims to support each other.  You may be sharing some ideas, perhaps, a workshop you want to run, and you want to get feedback from the group.  You later learn that your peer has packaged that program and started offering a version on their website without your permission. This feels hard because a lot of trust has been betrayed; you offered your ideas to get supported and not copied for others to profit.   Or, if you are doing an exercise on defining your mission and niche and others have shared their first draft and they seem really unclear, then you share yours, which is well articulated and thought out and you realize as the program continues, people are now using your niche because your work has influenced their thinking.  This can be quite frustrating because you put so much time and effort into getting clear on your authentic messaging and having it on your website, and they come in and try to take some of that language and shortcut the process for themselves.

6. Ideas Taken in Interviews.   During interviews or proposal submissions, you share ideas on workshops you want to deliver with the hiring manager. You do not get hired for the job but later learn that big pieces of your presentation were used by their internal team to deliver the content and exercises. It almost felt like the meeting was taken just to get fresh perspectives on what to do with no intention of procuring an outside contractor.

7. Diminished Introductions by Others.   Sometimes, peers or colleagues may introduce you in a reduced capacity, downplaying your role or contributions to a project.  I had a client who was running a project and was designated as the primary liaison for the visiting CEO.  Her peer who initially received the CEO introduced my client in a reduced capacity, basically saying she was helping to take care of some local logistical pieces even though she had a much bigger role. She has been misrepresented, and I would love to correct the record, but I do not want to seem petty.

Credit theft in the workplace is an unfortunate reality that many individuals face. It occurs for various reasons, ranging from insecurity and competitiveness to a lack of awareness about the importance of giving credit where it's due. By recognizing the common scenarios in which credit theft occurs, we can better prepare ourselves to respond.

Quote of the day: "Real integrity is doing the right thing, knowing that nobody's going to know whether you did it or not." - Oprah Winfrey

Question: Do you have examples of when somebody took credit for your work?  How did you respond?  Comment and share your experiences below; we’d love to hear.

The next blog in this series 2/2 will focus on strategies for reclaiming credit after a robbery. 

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with leaders to communicate effectively including strategically self-promoting, contact me to explore this topic further.

Has somebody taken credit for your ideas? What did you do?

Elevate Your Team’s Success (Self-advocacy series 7/7)

In addition to ensuring your contributions are visible, consider doing the same for your exceptional yet often unnoticed teammates and colleagues, particularly those who belong to underrepresented groups.

Let's explore ways to highlight other’s work:

1. Acknowledge Their Achievements. Recognize your teammates' accomplishments through thoughtful gestures such as gift cards, congratulatory lunches, or public acknowledgments on a Kudos board. When you celebrate their successes, you not only incentivize continued excellence but also convey their value to the team. Leadership Author Kevin Cruz highlighted that this recognition can significantly enhance performance and engagement.

2. Invest in Their Professional Development. Encourage and support your team members’ professional growth.  Provide opportunities for training, workshops, or courses that can enhance their skills and knowledge. Investing in their development benefits them, strengthens the team's capabilities, and advances the organization.

3. Provide Stretch Assignments. As a leader, identify your team members' strengths and assign them tasks or projects where they can showcase these abilities. Matching skills to opportunities for growth can profoundly impact their careers.  Columbia Law professor Alexander Carter shared a story of when all the lawyers from her class got together one month into their jobs to give talks.   The professor in the back of the room pulled her aside and let her know she was a fantastic speaker.  She said she would like to put her on a committee that gives legal presentations, and that allowed her to have so much more practice, which led to her incredibly successful career.

4. Offer Them Visibility with Leadership. Invite your teammates to meetings with you to increase their exposure. In leadership gatherings, amplify your team's voices and ensure their ideas receive proper credit. For example, you can say, "Jill's innovative approach to this event significantly improved employee satisfaction and connection. Jill, could you elaborate on this?" Or, “Bill came in with the winning idea that helped us gain the client’s trust.  Bill, can you share your strategy?” This practice elevates your team's contributions and highlights their significance.  You can take it a step further and put them on a substantial project so they can play a significant role by presenting to the executive team.

5. Endorse Them Privately.  Even when they are not present, endorse your teammates to your peers by discussing their achievements and sharing valuable insights your team has gained from them. Reference their ideas and represent their perspectives to contribute to their credibility. Incorporate any testimonials from key stakeholders or customers to reinforce their reputation.

6. Share Credit on Projects. Always acknowledge the team members who contributed to a project's success. Similar to the acknowledgments in a book or an Oscar winner's acceptance speech, emphasize that your success is a collective effort. Mention how your team played a pivotal role in making this happen. People appreciate success stories more when credit is attributed where it's deserved.

7. Express Appreciation of Your Team to Your Boss. When your teammates excel, send appreciation emails and consider copying your boss. This practice not only recognizes their accomplishments but also highlights their value within the team. 

8. Publicize your Team’s Efforts on Your LinkedIn.  Randelle Lenoir, VP Branch Leader at Fidelity Investments is a pro at this.  After speaking to her mentor, she set a goal for herself to post one thing on LinkedIn each week:  a photo of the team doing important work, a recent win they collectively had, or just an individual achievement.  One of the most popular posts was when a younger member held his certificate and announced that he had just passed his series 7 exam.  She usually has good engagement with other team members, chiming in during the celebrations. The impact this has had is that she has developed a pipeline of great people who want to work for her because they see how excellent the culture is.  This allows her to be agile in creating movement for current members, if they want to move on and do something else, she can pull from her waiting list.

By implementing these strategies, you can actively contribute to the success and recognition of your team members, creating an environment where everyone's contributions are acknowledged and celebrated. 

Quote of the day. "Great things in business are never done by one person; they're done by a team of people." - Steve Jobs

Question. How do you effectively promote your team?  Comment and share below; we’d love to hear! 

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with leaders to communicate effectively including strategically self-promoting, contact me to explore this topic further.

How do you promote your team’s successes?

Shifting Perceptions for a Promotable Future (Self-advocacy series 6/7)

If you find yourself passed over for a promotion but are determined to enact meaningful changes, there are effective strategies to shift perceptions and prepare for future opportunities.

According to Carol Kauffman, Founder of the Harvard Institute of Coaching, there can be a significant time lag between making behavioral improvements and others recognizing these changes, especially if prior behavior was viewed negatively. This transition can take several months, even up to a year. In cases where you've been labeled as challenging, stubborn, or self-centered, it may feel as if you're trapped in this perception.

Here are actionable steps to signal your growth and alter the way your supervisors and colleagues perceive you:

1. Promote Your Growth. Just as companies announce forthcoming product upgrades or service enhancements, market your efforts and substantiate your transformation with evidence. When a retail store undergoes renovation, they immediately inform customers, display a "coming soon" banner, and provide glimpses of the improved storefront or layout. You can apply this concept by openly sharing your personal development goals so they can begin to collect evidence to support those changes.  If you've received feedback about missing deadlines, communicate your commitment to meeting all deadlines without reminders.  If your manager sees you as someone who avoids problems instead of solving them, and you quietly change your behavior but don’t communicate what you are doing, they may not notice.  You can offer comments to show your proactively, such as, “I’m working on this challenge and maintaining full ownership until it is resolved. Here are some steps I’ve already taken; I’ll circle back when there is more to convey.”  If the same challenge arises in a larger team meeting, you can jump in and share that you are on the case and offer one thing you have done and your next step so they see you as having a good grasp of the situation.  You can also be diligent in your written communication.  If an email is sent to you and your manager, it is helpful to respond as soon as possible, letting them know you are on top of it and offering some next steps so they restore faith in your abilities.  When you alter your underlying behavior and showcase it, you start to create a new reputation. 

Bradley Cooper embarked on a similar issue of altering his reputation.  He is famous for being an incredible actor with hits like American Sniper and the Hangover Series and has received numerous academy awards, and is one of the highest-paid actors.  While his reputation was strong as an actor, he felt underutilized and wanted to Direct so when he pitched A Star Is Born to Warner Brothers, it was a big leap.  He got the job, received many Oscar nominations, and is widely recognized for being much more than a skilled actor.

2. Consistent Demonstrated Behavior. Consistently demonstrate the desired behaviors or qualities that you want others to perceive in you. For example, if you want to be seen as a proactive problem solver, consistently take the initiative to address challenges and find solutions. Send email updates without reminders to inform others of what’s going on. Over time, your actions will reinforce the new perception you're aiming for.

3. Demonstrate Leadership. Take on leadership roles and responsibilities within your organization or community. Leadership positions often have opportunities to showcase your abilities and qualities to a broader audience. Being a proactive leader who leads by example can change perceptions about your capabilities and potential for growth. 

3. Seek Feedback. Actively seek feedback to keep your changes at the forefront of others' minds. If you are working on improving your meeting management skills, engage your colleagues by informing them of your objective and requesting their input. Afterward, follow up with them to gather feedback on your progress. Regularly checking in on your goals will make others more aware of your efforts.

4. Seek Mentorship and Role Models. Seek mentorship from individuals with the qualities or skills you want to be known for. Learn from their experiences and let their guidance help shape your behavior and mindset. Having role models can provide real-life examples to emulate and inspire positive changes in how others perceive you.

5. Evaluate Alternative Paths.  In cases where the gap in perception seems insurmountable or when you lose motivation to change the situation, consider exploring new opportunities elsewhere. Sometimes, a fresh start in a different environment can offer the best path to advancement.

By focusing on these strategies, you can effectively change how others perceive your professional skills, capabilities, and potential.  

Quote of the day: “The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Question:  How do you best shift perceptions? Comment and share below; we’d love to hear from you.

The next blog in this series 7/7 will focus on promoting your team. 

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with leaders to communicate effectively including strategically self-promoting, contact me to explore this topic further.

How do you shift perceptions?

Mastering the Art of Promotion Requests: More Tips and Strategies (Self-advocacy series 5/7)

In the previous article, we delved into three crucial factors for seeking a promotion: accomplishments, vision, and passion.  This article will expand on these aspects and explore additional valuable tips.

1. Seek Endorsements from Allies.  Harness the power of endorsements from colleagues who can vouch for your leadership potential.  Approach them in advance to gauge their support and ask how they would describe your qualifications for a promotion. This not only strengthens your case but also provides insights for improvement.

2. Identify Decision Makers.  Promotions often involve a committee, especially at the higher levels. Discover their criteria and seek opportunities to collaborate with key decisionmakers on projects to showcase your capabilities and gain their support.

3. Have a Plan B.  If a promotion is not immediately available, consider alternative benefits. Request support for professional development, executive or leadership coaching, training opportunities, tuition reimbursement, or membership into professional organizations. Maybe they can connect you with a mentor so you can learn another part of the business, or you can ask to attend key executive meetings so you can gain greater visibility to the broader part of how the company operates, or push for a flexible schedule so you can enhance your skills and value.

If they say no to your promotion because of promotion freezes by the company and not because you are not ready, you can ask if you would have their support next time and get that verbal agreement in advance.

If they say no because they feel you are not ready, try not to leave the conversation unless you are clear on the 2-3 things to focus on to get promoted in the next cycle. You can ask what are two skills that people in that position demonstrate so you can start working on them.  Or, is there something you should stop doing that would help you advance in your career?

4. Cultivate and Leverage Authentic Relationships.   Before vying for a promotion, you should build a reputation as somebody who builds good relationships and is a team player.  Be willing to jump in for others, offer support, build on their ideas, and celebrate them.  When you realize that somebody is having trouble with a new program, volunteer to jump in and share so you can fast-track their learning; those gestures go a long way.  Maybe you hear another leader having trouble finding certain information, and that’s your area of expertise; you can email the information even without being asked to do so.

Also, it is okay to leverage relationships which are at the heart of building many successful careers. Madeline Albright got to know Bill Clinton and wrote him a recommendation, and then he returned the favor and nominated her to a critical political position; of course, she was qualified, but many other people were as well.  Men are good at exchanging favors, whereas women tend to give their time to help without expecting something in return.  This is what a typical exchange can look like for many women, your coworker John says, “Can you fill in the meeting for me tomorrow?” You respond, “I don’t think so, I have a lot going on.” He pushes and says, “I have another meeting where a key decision needs to be made and if I don’t show, that project will be delayed by weeks.  You relent and say, ok and he says thanks.  That should not be the end of the exchange.  It would help if you then signaled reciprocity.  “Sure, I’ll fill in, but I need your help on Thurs. morning to get this part of the work done.”   If you have no upcoming work that needs to get done, you can say, “You owe me one if I need coverage later on.  Sound good?”

5. Speak confidentially. Don’t be tentative in describing your skills and experience.  For example, “I’ve never held a position like this before so I’m not sure if my skills are an exact match.”  It seems like more of an issue for women because less qualified men are much bolder.  They may say, “I have exactly the skills you seek and easily meet the requirements because I’m excellent in x, y, and z.”  Replace your tentative language: “I think I can contribute,” with stronger language: “Here is how I plan to contribute;” “My track record shows that I’ll be able to…”

6. Define Your Desired Role.  You should know the role you are going for to make your case.  If the organization has created a new role, it is an excellent opportunity to define it as you cocreate the details.  If you suggest a new position, map out a job description while leaving space for them to add their thoughts, generating greater buy-in.  You are trying to make it easy for the other person to say yes, and if they have yet to learn the specifics of the role, they are more likely to say no because there are too many factors to consider.

7. Increase Market Rate Awareness.  Research market rates for similar roles at other companies to understand your value.  Internally, research on compensation packages of peers in comparable positions with similar team sizes should be gathered to negotiate effectively. 

8. Demonstrate Competencies.  Showcase how you already possess the competencies required for the next level. If there are some that you are not doing, you can offer your plan to fill those gaps.   

9. Address Concerns. Proactively address any concerns or reservations that decisionmakers may have. Offer practical solutions and share your vision for overcoming potential challenges.  For example, they may be worried that you have never run a team more than 10 so 30 is too big of a stretch.  You can walk through your vision of how you would manage that challenge.  Or, if you now have to start a partnership with the engineering team but have little exposure, you can talk about your plan to build relationships and collaborate efficiently.

10. Be Tactful in Disclosing Weaknesses.  Sharing your development gaps can be helpful, especially when you have an environment of trust and support.  When somebody has power over your pay and promotion, you can also be cautious, especially if you are unsure about the trust and depths of your relationship.  Instead of saying, “I have imposter syndrome running this team that are more experienced and older than me.” I would frame it in seeking advice.  “You have always been so helpful; I would love to learn your approach to running teams that have more experience than you?”

11. Correcting Misconceptions.  If you encounter misinterpretations or inaccuracies in feedback, address them promptly.  I was working with a leader once who was asking questions about a new vision that was rolled out.  The HRBP, who was in the meeting, labeled him as not quick to get on board.  There were no other data points to support that statement, yet feedback followed him for a long time.  When that happens, be sure to correct the record.  Schedule time with the person who gave the feedback to try to understand it better.  See if there are examples they can provide.  Share what you have been doing to bring people along.  Provide context for your approach. e.g., “At the beginning of a new initiative, I tend to ask many questions to gain greater understanding. It is so I am better prepared to answer questions that I will get from my team. The number of questions is more related to deeply understanding it than questioning your vision.”

12. Interview Elsewhere.  This is helpful because you learn about other opportunities, better understand your worth, and refine your self-presentation.  If you get an offer, you can take it to your boss as a powerful negotiating tool.  Sometimes, companies are reluctant to promote from within too quickly, but when faced with losing you, they magically find money because letting you go is more expensive than paying the extra money you want.  In fact, it can cost companies up to 100k or more to bring somebody in and onboard them.

13. Avoid Bluffing.  Honestly is essential. Never claim to have another offer unless you genuinely intend to accept it. Bluffing can damage your credibility and future promotion prospects. 

By incorporating these additional strategies into your promotion request process, you can effectively enhance your chances of success and navigate the complexities of career advancement.

Quote of the day: "If you don't ask, you don't get." - Mahatma Gandhi

Question.  Who do you know that is great at asking for a promotion?  What was their approach and why were they effective? Comment and share below; we’d love to hear from you!

The next blog in this series 6/7 will focus on ways to showcase your growth to shift perspectives. 

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with leaders to communicate effectively including strategically self-promoting, contact me to explore this topic further.

How do you gain allies before you ask for a promotion?

Making your promotion case: Preparing for Career Advancement Conversations (Self-advocacy series 4/7)

Asking for a promotion or raise can be intimidating, often causing individuals to shy away from a potentially uncomfortable conversation. However, it's crucial to advocate for yourself and seize opportunities for professional growth. In this article, we will explore three key steps to put your promotion case together and be ready for the conversation.

1. Document Your accomplishments.  Before approaching the conversation, document your top 3-5 achievements across various work areas.  Specify the strategies you employed, the results achieved, and the context in which you operated. For instance, describe how when you took over the customer success team at the beginning of the year, they lacked infrastructure and fell short of their targets.  You restructured the team, defined clear roles and responsibilities, introduced new metrics and processes, and achieved a 10% customer growth during layoffs and fewer resources. 

You can document your wins as a leader and the impact on teams and culture.  Maybe you have created a high-performing team that receives consistent positive feedback from key cross-functional partners and have gotten your people promoted and recognized throughout the organization.   For culture, perhaps you led successful offsites that resulted in more cohesive teams and the reduction of silos or put in place a series of cultural practices that have increased engagement and morale, innovation, retention, and high performance.  Or, you are a great culture carrier and can be relied on to do the right thing and represent the organization the way it wants.

It is helpful to keep a running list of accomplishments that you add to monthly so that when it is time for your promotion, you already have the information; it is just a matter of packaging it into three big advancements.  If you are not delivering your results, it may be challenging to get promoted.  In that case, do not just evaluate the last six months to a year, but look at a longer horizon to see how the context and global factors have played a role.  Maybe the expectations have shifted, and your new bar for success should be just maintaining the current customer base rather than gaining 5% additional customers because this is in the context of your competitors seeing a norm of 10% loss.  You could have set your goals when the context was much different, so you must adjust expectations. 

2. Share Your Vision & Benefits.  If your track record and accomplishments are about the past, the other focus should be on your future potential and how you show you are a franchise player.  What is your vision for your role and the department in the short and long term?  Where do you want to take it?   Connect the dots to demonstrate how your promotion can benefit your unit, other teams, and the entire organization.   Explain how the promotion will empower you to accomplish more.  Consider how it will enhance your ability to collaborate with other department heads because they want to work with their title peers.  If you are already great at people management, a bigger team will allow you to have more impact in bringing out people’s best, contributing to engagement and retention, and the goal of entering new markets.  Always tie your case back to the business benefits and the advantages for the team and company.

2A. Use the “I /We” Formula.  Alexander Carter, Columbia Law Professor & Negotiation Expert advocates using this formula to emphasize multiple benefits.  “Here’s what I’m asking, and here’s how we, as an organization, will benefit from my enhanced role.”   “If you bring me in at the VP level, we, as an organization will benefit from the combination of operational and technical experience.”  Making a case that is just about you is a losing proposition.  For example, “I really need this because my kid is entering college this year.”  Aim to maintain your objectivity.

2B. Identify Your Successor.  In your vision, name your potential successor.  Ideally, you have been grooming them to step into your role seamlessly.  If this is not the case, perhaps your possible appointment recently took a job elsewhere, outline a plan to prepare an internal candidate or consider external hiring to bridge any skill gaps needed for the team’s growth.   

3. Convey Passion.  Express your enthusiasm and passion for a more extensive scope and opportunity. Make it clear why you're driven to take on more responsibility and how it will invigorate your work. Demonstrating your eagerness reduces uncertainty and inspires confidence in those who support your advancement and may be taking risks. Let your passion shine through to energize yourself and also those around you.

When it comes to requesting a promotion, preparation is critical.  Have a concise statement highlighting your current achievements, aspirations, and the reasons driving your pursuit. 

Quote of the day. “Opportunities don’t happen. You create them.” -Chris Grosser

Question of the Day. What lessons have you learned about asking for a promotion?  What worked and what hasn’t? Comment and share below; we’d love to hear from you!

The next blog in this series 5 /7 will focus on refined strategies for influencing. 

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with leaders to communicate effectively including strategically self-promoting, contact me to explore this topic further.

What’s your approach to asking for a promotion?

Strategies To Elevate Your Work Visibility? (self-advocacy series 3/7)

In the preceding two articles, we delved into the challenges of self-promotion and the importance of cultivating new beliefs to boost your career visibility. Once you've grasped the significance of making your work more visible, especially if you operate behind the scenes, it's time to explore practical steps to reshape the outcome.

Let’s explore strategies for enhancing the visibility of your work:

1. Excel in Your Work.  The foundation of increased visibility begins with consistently delivering exceptional work.  Establishing a reputation as someone who consistently completes tasks correctly and efficiently without reminders, makes you a reliable and valuable asset.  Colleagues will see you as a dependable and high-yield investment of their time and resources.

2. Foster Mutually Supportive Relationships.  Publicly championing the successes of others can pave the way for solid alliances.  When you celebrate the achievements of your colleagues, they are more likely to reciprocate, resulting in a robust network of support.

3. Seek Feedback.  It's easy to underestimate your accomplishments.  Soliciting feedback from trusted individuals offers an external perspective that helps you comprehensively understand your achievements, enabling you to communicate them more effectively.

Additionally, Leadership Expert Liz Wiseman suggests these approaches for tactfully drawing attention to your contributions:

1. Providing Informative Updates.  Sharing an FYI on tasks you've completed to make others' work easier can boost your visibility. For instance, “I took care of the list of escalated issues from yesterday’s executive meeting, so you don’t need to worry about them.”   This notification demonstrates your commitment and reliability.

2. Optimize processes.   If your work involves routine processes, consider innovating and optimizing them. Successful innovations garner appreciation, while unsuccessful attempts will still draw attention to your dedication to improvement.

3. Delegate to Highlight Workload.  Delegating some of your responsibilities, especially those that often go unnoticed, can highlight the complexity of your workload. Others may better appreciate your contributions when they experience firsthand what’s on your plate.  When you take a couple of weeks off and truly unplug (not getting a few things done here and there or being responsive to calls) and your boss has to assume parts of your work, they will have a newfound appreciation when they learn the full scope of your tasks.  This is also what Debra Stepple, Sr. VP of Tech and Marketing Functions for a financial planning company experienced in her personal domain.  When she was forced to spend several months on pregnancy-related bedrest, her husband assumed some of her duties including carrying the laundry up two flights of stairs. He realized how hard it must be for his wife who is just over 5 feet to manage the massive family load.  When she got better, he never gave her back that task because the full depth of her work was only seen once he experienced it.

4. Seize Key Moments.  Skilled waiters who work efficiently in the background know how to step forward in crucial moments.  Right before they deliver the bill, they may let you see the work they have done on your behalf by saying, “Just to let you know I put a rush on your order to ensure you get to the theater on time.” You too can seize opportunities to come to the forefront strategically. When your boss acknowledges your excellent work, you can express interest in future opportunities. E.g., “I see we have a meeting next week; I have more ideas to contribute.  Would it be helpful for me to get added to the agenda?” 

5. Show Your work.  When you simply tell somebody what you have done, they may not comprehend the full scope of all the tricky challenges involved.  Much like a math problem, presenting a final answer may give the impression of simplicity.  However, displaying all the smaller steps in the process reveals the complexity and effort behind your results. 

5A. Focus on the Process & Results.  To show the process, you can start with the challenges and share the strategies/steps you employed, and then you can share the outcomes and lessons you’ve learned for future projects.

5B. Stick to the Facts.  You can guide others to draw favorable conclusions when you share the facts and do not offer your interpretations.  For example, instead of saying “I’m an expert writer,” you can say, “I’ve published ten articles on this topic.”  Rather than saying, I’m an excellent leader,” you can say, “Since I took over the team, we have seen sales double.”  Rather than you making sweeping generalizations, let them come to their conclusions based on your data.

6 Share Evidence of Success.  Periodically share compliments and feedback you receive with your leaders. For example, “I am thrilled by the result of this campaign and grateful for the team’s support.  I was equally excited when the client shared a testimonial.  I aim to continue wowing this client so we can land even bigger campaigns.”   You can even encourage your customers and collaborators to share positive feedback directly with your leaders. 

6A Assist your Boss in Showcasing your Victories.  You can also help your boss package the wins to their leadership teams.  When there is a significant accomplishment, you can thank your boss for the opportunity to work on the project and how excited you were with what the team accomplished.  You can say, you were especially proud of these two things and distill the successes, so it is top of mind for them to share upwardly.

Enhancing the visibility of your work involves a blend of strategy and effective communication. By consistently delivering outstanding results, fostering supportive relationships, and sharing your successes in a structured and factual manner, you can ensure that your contributions are recognized and valued appropriately.

Quote of the day. "Your work is your responsibility, no matter the task. Own it. Adapt it. Elevate it." - Jason Taylor

Question of the day.  What helpful tips can you offer to make your work more visible? Comment and share below; we’d love to hear from you!

The next blog in this series 4/7 will focus on how to ask for a promotion.

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with leaders to communicate effectively including strategically self-promoting, contact me to explore this topic further.

How do you make your work more visible?

More Challenges Holding You Back from Self-Promotion (self-advocacy series 2/7)

In the previous article, we explored two top challenges related to self-promotion. This article will delve into additional common challenges individuals may face in their journey toward effective advocacy.

1. Overcoming Shyness.  Many people are reticent to talk about their accomplishments in front of others because they may not know what to say or how to say it. 

·      Stepping Outside of Your Comfort Zone.  Leadership often involves moving beyond what’s familiar to develop new skills.  You may be good at back-of-the-room leadership, doing great work behind the scenes but it’s also essential to know how to excel when front-of-the-room leadership is required.  While initial awkwardness may occur when you are developing this muscle, it means you are learning and doing hard things, and the long-term personal growth benefits will eclipse the short-term pains.

2. Letting Your Work Speak for Itself.  In How Women Rise, Sally Helgeson labels this career-limiting habit as “expecting others to spontaneously notice and reward your hard work.”  This passive approach can hinder your career progression.

·      Taking Initiative.  People are too busy to notice what you are doing, they are in non-stop meetings, have full agendas, and are working hard to hit their deadlines.  Rather than take this passive approach, speaking about the work and providing context that highlights its quality is better.  Nobody will be able to advocate for yourself the way you can, and how can you get recognized by leadership if they have no visibility into the work you are doing?

3. Managing Busyness.  Some feel like they have a million things going on and do not have the headspace to think about how they will share what they are doing.  This is especially true if you are a high achiever who cares about being a good leader;  you are usually always in action mode and do not have time to reflect, zoom out, and think about how you can position yourself.

·      Viewing Self-Promotion as Essential. Rather than consider self-advocacy as a separate task, view it as an integral part of your job.  When a company develops a new product, that’s only part of their work.  They then have to market it.  If you think you are too busy, you will stay in your current role and not prepare for what’s next.  It is essential to take time to step back and prioritize your career advancement because nobody will manage your career the way you can.

4. Balancing Enjoying Good Work.  Some individuals find great satisfaction in helping others and believe that getting recognized is secondary.   While valuing good work is commendable, recognition is essential for career progression.

·      Reframing Recognition.  The acknowledgment of your contributions can lead to more significant opportunities to make a broader impact.  Avoid being pigeonholed and overlooked for growth opportunities by ensuring your work is noticed and appreciated.

5. Navigating the Double Bind.  In some cultures, stereotypes about gender and leadership may pose unique challenges regarding self-promotion, particularly for women. Traditional ideals of leadership are often associated with qualities such as decisiveness, assertiveness, and independence, which can align more closely with masculinity.  Conversely, women are expected to exhibit traits like nurturing and selflessness. This disconnect places female leaders in a double bind, where they must navigate a delicate balance between demonstrating competence and likability. Research has shown that women excelling in traditionally male-dominated fields may be perceived as competent but less likable than their male counterparts. Behaviors considered self-confidence and assertiveness in men may be viewed as arrogance or abrasiveness in women. On the other hand, women who adopt a conventionally feminine leadership style may be liked but not respected, as they may be seen as too emotional or soft to make tough decisions. These challenges underscore that self-promotion can be more complex for certain groups.

·      Defying Stereotypes.  It's important to acknowledge that these challenges persist, and people may form perceptions of you even when you're not actively self-promoting. Ruth Bader Ginsberg, a former Supreme Court Justice who graduated at the top of her class at Columbia Law School, faced jealousy and derogatory comments from male colleagues. Her response, "better to be called a bitch than mouse (and not ever speaking up)," highlights the importance of not shrinking oneself to conform to others' expectations. Had women in the 70s been overly concerned with meeting societal expectations, the management field would be largely devoid of women. It's crucial not to diminish yourself to please others; instead, approach this challenge with thoughtfulness and intention.

·     Challenging Perceptions.  Another valuable strategy is to challenge others' definitions and perceptions. For instance, if someone labels you ambitious, inquire about their definition. If their definition carries a negative connotation (doing whatever you can to get to the top), provide your interpretation (someone eager to maximize opportunities and rise through the ranks to make a significant impact). By taking control of the narrative and asserting your definitions, you can effectively navigate the complexities of self-promotion in the face of societal stereotypes.

Overcoming these common challenges can pave the way for effective self-promotion and career advancement, ensuring that your accomplishments receive the recognition they deserve.

Quote of the day: "The most important career decision you'll ever make is whether you will promote yourself." - Clare Boothe Luce 

Question:  What effective strategies do you employ to self-promote?  Who do you know that does this well, and what do they do? Comment and share below; we’d love to hear from you!

The next blog in this series 3/7 will focus on specific approaches to elevating your work.

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with leaders to communicate effectively including strategically self-promoting, contact me to explore this topic further.

How do you promote yourself graciously?

Mastering Self-Advocacy: Overcoming Common Challenges (self-advocacy series 1/7)

Self-promotion can be daunting, often leaving individuals grappling with concerns about how they will be perceived when discussing their accomplishments.  The fear of coming across as arrogant or self-centered can deter people from effectively showcasing their skills and achievements. However, self-promotion is not an all-or-nothing proposition; a third way allows individuals to promote their work artfully and tactfully, thereby advancing their careers. 

This article will explore two common challenges hindering self-promotion and strategies to overcome them.  The second article in this series will delve into additional obstacles that individuals may encounter in the quest for effective self-advocacy.      

1. Avoiding Bragging

Concerns about sounding arrogant or self-centered when self-promoting are valid, especially if you are constantly using “I” and not acknowledging other’s efforts or putting down peers, such as, “Unlike my peers, I exceeded my goals…”. However, there is a way to discuss your work without sounding cocky.

·       Educational opportunity.  Reframe self-promotion as an opportunity to educate others.  By sharing your work, including the challenges and lessons learned, you provide valuable insights to your colleagues.   It also signals to others that they can seek your assistance if you possess specific expertise demonstrated through recent projects.  In the 1990s, Intel faced a similar challenge of insufficient promotion despite being the market leader in microprocessors, renowned for their technical superiority and high-quality products.  Their microprocessors outperformed competitors' chips, offering faster speeds and enhanced capabilities. However, there was a disconnect between their exceptional technology and consumer awareness. To address this issue, Intel launched a successful branding campaign by incorporating its "Intel Inside" logo on computers. This initiative effectively raised Intel's visibility, making it a household name and influencing consumer choices. The lesson here is that, like Intel, individuals should enhance their visibility to ensure their value is recognized.

·       Better Utilization.  Sharing your skillsets helps the company better understand how to leverage your abilities efficiently.  This prevents misaligned job requisitions and ensures your skills are put to their best use.  It also helps them avoid bringing in other people if they have somebody who can already do aspects of the job.

·       Focus on High Achievers.  Companies sometimes pay disproportionate attention to people who are not meeting benchmarks and ignore those blowing it out of the water. There is a real business case for shifting that attention and those resources to the high performers because they will likely be flight risks if they feel underutilized.  At the same time, organizations will be left with average employers.

·       Informing new leaders.  There are times when new leaders come into the company, and they do not know your track record, so it may take a while for them to learn all your capabilities and interests. Having that information on the sooner side is so helpful so they can best leverage your talents.   The more you share what you have done, what you are proud of, what you have learned that might benefit others, and what you want to do next, the easier it is for them to utilize you.

·       Creating an Equitable Playing Field.   Failure to share your accomplishments can disproportionately affect women, as men often get promoted based on potential while women rely on their track record for recognition. 

·       Controlling Efforts and Ignoring Unhelpful Opinions.   You cannot control what others think, but you can control your efforts to share your passions and accomplishments.  Your sharing has the potential to give you visibility and propel your career.  You can choose not to share anything, and they can still think all those things about you anyway, yet you have missed the possible benefit. 

2. Being a Team Player.   Some believe sharing their achievements may overshadow the team's work or negatively impact their image as a team player. However, there is a balance that allows you to highlight both individual contributions and team success.

·      Recognize Great Teamwork.  It is easy to fall into either/or mindset – thinking that sharing your achievements means you aren't a team player.  However, every team comprises individuals who naturally desire recognition for their efforts. With this in mind, you can appreciate the team's great work while also recognizing individual contributions to success. This phenomenon is common in sports, where the team's victory is celebrated alongside specific standout moments like a critical defensive stop, a key goal, or a game-winning pass. It aligns with Social Psychologist Marilynn Brewer's Optimal Distinctiveness Theory, which suggests that at every level, people seek to belong to a team while having a unique role to play. Balancing both individual and collective recognition is essential.

Self-promotion is a crucial skill for career growth, and this article addressed two common challenges: the fear of bragging and concerns about being seen as a team player. You can overcome these obstacles by reframing self-advocacy positively and balancing individual recognition with teamwork.   Stay tuned for more insights in the next article on mastering self-promotion and advancing your career.

Quote of the day: "Don't be afraid to shine; the world needs your light as much as you need it to grow." - Matshona Dhliwayo, Philosopher & Author

Question:  What is the biggest challenge you have in promoting yourself?  Comment and share below; we’d love to hear from you!

The next blog in this series 2/7 will focus on additional challenges and strategies with self-promotion.

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with leaders to communicate effectively, including strategically self-promoting; contact me to explore this topic further.

How do you advocate for yourself?

Cultivating Commitment: A Guide to Securing Workplace Buy-in (Influence Series 4/4)

When you are successful with influence, you get buy-in or explicit agreement or commitment from others, often toward an idea, proposal, or project.  Buy-in indicates that the stakeholders or team members understand, support, and are committed to the initiative.

Let’s delve into practical strategies for obtaining buy-in with your team.  This same approach can be used with other groups you seek to gain support.

1. Fostering Open Dialogue and Collaboration.  Create space to collect as many voices as possible.  If you bring ideas to a project team and notice they are bouncing around with only a few voices dominating, invite the quieter team members to share their thoughts.  You can request that each member shares once before anybody else goes for a second time. This will validate the presence of all members, possibly solicit winning ideas from unexpected sources, and solidify the buy-in process as you incorporate the collective wisdom in the room and bring others along.

2. Offering Options.  Choice is a powerful motivator.  Consider a scenario where you need to implement a new software system.  By presenting the team with two vetted options and allowing them to select the one they prefer, you are not making a decision but rather empowering the team to shape their work environment. 

3. Encouraging Initiative.  There is something about owning an idea that ignites a drive in people.  When faced with a challenge, asking team members to propose solutions first can lead to innovation and a stronger commitment to the project’s success. For example, when a sales team faces declining numbers, the manager could ask each member to suggest strategies before proposing their ideas.  This can result in a team fully invested in the turnaround plan they helped craft.

4. Clarifying Roles While Encouraging Autonomy.  Clarity breeds confidence.  When everyone knows ‘what’ needs to be done but has the freedom to decide ‘how’, they’re most invested.  Take a software development team: the Team Lead outlines the feature requirements but leaves the implementation approach to the developer’s expertise, enhancing their ownership and accountability.

5. Encouraging Inquiry.  Questions are the pickaxes of understanding.  Allowing team members to ask questions during the decision-making process does not just clarify; it deepens their engagement.  It’s like a product development team querying the specifics of user feedback. It leads to a product that not only meets but exceeds expectations.

6. Practicing Empathy.  Understanding team members' daily experiences and challenges can transform the approach to influence.  For example, a manager considering a shift to remote work takes the time to understand each employee’s home setup and responsibilities, tailoring solutions that work for all.  Buy-in is more easily obtained when you are in touch with their realities.

Securing buy-in is an artful blend of communication, choice, and empathy.  Effective leaders listen actively, provide choices, and practice empathy, weaving individual commitments into a tapestry of collective success. The true measure of influence is the shared enthusiasm and dedication it inspires.

Quote of the day: You can’t inspire people if you are going to be uninspiring’ -Robert Reich

What has worked for you in securing buy-in at work?  Comment and share with us; we would love to hear!

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with leaders to sharpen their influencing skills for win-win opportunities, contact me to explore this topic further.

Gaining buy-in for your ideas is an essential skill

The Power of Persuasion: Harnessing Cialdini’s Framework for Influential Leadership (Influence Series 3/4)

The last blog explored numerous ways to influence.  This one will focus on one model from renowned author Robert Cialdini, an American Psychologist and Professor who wrote a popular book on persuasion and marketing.  He found that influence is based on six key principles: reciprocity, commitment and consistency, social proof, authority, liking, and scarcity.  A 7th principle of unity was added later.  

Here is what the concepts are all about and their applications to the workplace:

1. Reciprocity:  People have a natural tendency to reciprocate when someone does something for them. If you do a favor for someone, they are more likely to feel obligated to do something in return.  When working on a team or project, offer to help your colleagues when they need assistance.  They are more likely to reciprocate and help you in return and relationships can naturally blossom.

2. Commitment and Consistency: Once people make a commitment or take a stand on a particular issue, they tend to behave in ways that are consistent with that commitment. They want to align their actions with their stated beliefs. When presenting an idea or proposal, highlight how it aligns with the company's mission or previous decisions, emphasizing consistency with past actions to bring others along.

3. Social Proof:  People often look to the behavior of others as a guide for their own actions. When they see that many others are doing something, they are more likely to follow suit. Share success stories or case studies of how others in your organization have achieved positive results using a particular strategy or product.

Use testimonials and reviews to demonstrate that your product or service has been well-received by others in the industry.

4. Authority:  People tend to trust and obey authority figures.  They are more likely to be influenced by someone who is perceived as knowledgeable, credible, or an expert in a particular domain.  When presenting, establish your expertise by citing research, experience, or relevant qualifications.  Collaborate with influential figures or experts in your field to lend credibility to your initiatives or projects.

5. Liking: People are more easily influenced by those they like or feel a connection with so aim to find common interests. Building rapport and establishing a positive relationship can enhance your ability to persuade others, and a great way to do that is by showing genuine interest in their needs and concerns. 

6. Scarcity: The idea that something is scarce or in limited supply can make it more desirable to people.  They may be motivated to take action to acquire it before it's gone.  Create a sense of urgency around important projects or deadlines to motivate team members to prioritize their work.  Offer limited-time promotions or discounts to encourage customers to make purchasing decisions more quickly.

7. Unity: The more we identify ourselves with others, the more we are influenced by them.  Taking time to find commonalities through one-on-one engagements or team-building activities will allow you to build a good rapport and influence others.  You can emphasize common goals and values.

Cialdini’s principles provide a robust framework for ethical persuasion that can be applied to the workplace.  These concepts can enhance your ability to navigate team dynamics and inspire action. Influence, when rooted in authenticity, can drive progress and strengthen bonds within any organization.

Quote of the day: “The key to successful leadership is influence, not authority.” -Ken Blanchard

Which principle do you find to be the hardest and easiest to apply in the workplace?  Comment and share with us; we would love to hear!

The next blog in this series 4/4 will focus on getting buy-in.

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with leaders to sharpen their influencing skills for win-win opportunities, contact me to explore this topic further.

How are you successful with influencing?

Influence in Action: Strategies Beyond Initial Planning (Influence Series 2/4)

In the previous blog, we navigated the intricate landscape of influence – uncovering the preparatory steps to set the stage for effective persuasion. This article will focus on what comes after the groundwork is already laid.

Let’s jump into some refined strategies for influencing:

1. Adapt your approach depending on the audience.   Influence is not a one-size-fits-all; tailor your style to match the audience, and if you are unsure, ask others their preferred style.

·      When you are trying to work cross-functionally and need to win the support of a peer you may want to opt for a bridging approach, which is all about building coalitions sometimes by making concessions to reach outcomes that satisfy your greater interest. 

·      If you are in crisis and people are relying on you to be decisive, you may want to use an asserting approach where you insist on the importance of your idea, making the call to run a pilot and revisit later.  

·      If you are dealing with a leader who heavily relies on logic, like a CFO, you may want to use a convincing approach based on logic, data, and expertise.  

2. Ask and enroll rather than tell.  Instead of presenting solutions immediately, ask open-ended questions to understand others’ challenges and perspectives and learn best about root causes.  Some questions include: What’s really going on here, how long has it been going on, what have you tried, why didn’t it work, what will be different, etc.  So many times, people will say, I need training on X, but it turns out that it would only treat the symptom because they really need Y. Dive deep to uncover the source and comprehensively understand their needs. 

Avoid dictating solutions; rather, involve others in the process. Right before the pandemic, an Executive client of mine told me that he presented to senior leaders a body of evidence that people who can work out of the office part-time tend to be happier, more productive, and will likely stay so he wanted to run a remote Friday experiment.  Immediately, the other leaders responded with reasons why they could not do that, and it was because he came in sounding like a preacher who saw the light and had the answers to a complex problem.  A better approach is to share an observation (“I am interested in the movement for growing flexibility at work”), and ask questions for engagement (“What do you see in your teams and organizations?”  “What are some upsides and downsides?”  “How could we design an experiment to combine the good and eliminate the bad and see if we can get similar results?”). This approach can be more collaborative and appealing and get buy-in.

3. Define the Win and Find Alignment.  It is one thing to say what you want and another thing to say what the win looks like and why it is important now.  Additionally, it is crucial to align your initiative with the other person’s goals and demonstrate how it benefits all parties.  In The Go Giver, one of the Five Laws of Stratospheric Success is a law on influence, which is determined by how abundantly you place other people’s interests first.  Adam Grant in Give and Take supports this idea and offers advice to appeal to their nobler motives, such as, “we all want to move forward and head to this deadline for these stakeholders.  Let’s spend our time today figuring out what’s not working and think about the big picture.”

You can use the Triangle framework (win-win-win).  As a result of this initiative, how does the company, the other team, and your team win?  You can also think about what happens if this does not get done. What’s the cost to the three entities?

4. Speak in “We,” not “I.”  Use inclusive language to convey a sense of collaboration rather than a zero-sum mentality. 

5. Frame the Discussion.  Control the narrative by steering the conversation in the desired direction.  Set the perspective and context to guide the audience’s understanding.  

6. Provide Evidence.  Leverage social proof and data to support your ideas.  Highlighting others' shared options and providing specific testimonials builds credibility.  For example, we surveyed 1,000 of our most loyal customers, and here is what they told us.  You can point to key leaders in the organization who have a lot of credibility and share how they also loved the idea when you shared it with them.  If others know that person is excited about an idea, they will be more likely to listen to it. 

Additionally, sharing data is essential.  If you ran some A/B testing and have data that supports one approach over another, offer that information.  Introducing data points from external companies regarding what is happening in the industry is always helpful.  One of my clients had to make a difficult decision about layoffs, and when she looked around the industry, she realized that 15% was the norm, so her suggestion of 10% was below average, making her influencing attempts easier.

7. Tell a good story.  When you can recast your arguments in an engaging story that touches people’s emotional and logical sides, they will receive your information even more.

8. Surface disagreements.  If you experience resistance, identify disagreements to find a way forward.  There will always be people with different opinions who see things differently and that’s ok.  You can state the disagreement and ask a few questions to uncover the root of the disagreement. For example, you can inquire:

·      What are we optimizing for?  (The goal should be aligned rather than having two different goals).

·      Are we focused on solving for different target audiences (you are designing for power users and I am for the causal user).

·      What are our working assumptions and what goes into forming them? (you may be operating from two fundamentally different assumptions).

At the end of the day, influencing is not about getting what you want or manipulating; it is about finding those win-win opportunities for all to benefit.  You want to be proud of the way you influence because you did it with kindness, respect, authenticity, and integrity.   

Quote of the day: “Smiling unknowingly influences how other people will respond to you.”  -Liam Jackson

How do you influence successfully?  What do you find hard about it?  Comment and share with us; we would love to hear!

The next blog in this series 3/4 will focus on a specific model of influence.

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with leaders to sharpen their influencing skills for win-win opportunities, contact me to explore this topic further.

What’s your way of bringing others along?

The Art of Influence- for good (Influence Series 1/4)

Whether you need to drive a project forward, inspire a team, or advocate for change will depend on how well you have honed the coveted skill of influencing.  This can be defined as the ability to affect the actions, beliefs, or decisions of others through direct or indirect ways.  It is not about manipulation or coercion, rather, it’s built on genuine relationships and strategic communication aimed at achieving win-win solutions.

Challenges in Effective Influence

1. Working cross-functionally.  In many organizations, pivotal tasks transcend traditional hierarchies as you likely collaborate with peers and teammates outside your direct report line.  Those individuals might be driven by different objectives.  If you are working with 2+ teams, the complexities are compounded as what is beneficial for one team might be less important for another.  The challenge lies in shaping your pitch to resonate with different teams who might have different priorities and who may not want to upvote yours ahead of theirs.

2. Navigating Politics.  Every organization has its political undertones, be it alliances, rivalries, or past grievances.  Even if you bring forth groundbreaking ideas, they might be overshadowed by internal politics.  Some stakeholders, due to past affiliations, might not be receptive, irrespective of the merit of your proposal.

3. Encountering Change Resistors.  Many people gravitate toward predictability and consistency, making them hesitant to embrace new initiatives that might disturb the established routines or make their worklife a little more difficult. Your ideas can be great, but others may be dug in on the status quo.

4. Dealing with Resource Constraints.  Securing buy-in to your idea is just the beginning.  Even if stakeholders align with your viewpoint, the practical execution may fail due to limited resources, be it time, funding, or dedicated personnel.  Convincing teams to act, especially when resources are scarce, poses its own set of challenges.

Influencing starts way before the moment.  There is a lot of prework you can do to be set up for success.

Let’s explore effective strategies for influence:

1. Build good relationships.  Success in any role hinges on building positive, mutually beneficial relationships.  Take time to get to know your colleagues before needing any assistance.  Stephen Covey talks about the importance of building an “emotional bank account,” which is about depositing goodwill and trust into other people’s accounts.  This can be about affirming what others say in a meeting, engaging in deep listening to help others clarify an issue, or having a positive encounter that adds some joy to their lives.  If they have done something for you, thanking them with deep gratitude does wonders for relationship building.  People do business and work on initiatives with those they know and trust.

2. Create a perspective map.  Before attempting to influence, create a map of key stakeholders, such as skip level boss, manager, teammates, cross-functional peers, and identify their priorities.  List their current and future concerns, as well as their desired outcomes.  Consider how you want them to think, feel, and act because of your interaction.   

3. Practice Perspective-Taking.  Building trust and influence often involves empathizing with others and understanding their perspectives and priorities.  Dale Carnegie said, the only way to influence somebody is to find out what they want and show them how to get it.  It is about earnestly seeing from another point of view because ultimately people do things for their reasons and not yours so when you can tap into their intrinsic motivation, it will make a big difference.  Understanding where they are, caring genuinely, and appreciating it will help them move along and get them to where they want to go. 

A big reason why this does not happen is because people are too busy thinking about their next responses that they usually do not listen fully and are not as present to spot potential synergies.   Asking a follow-up question or offering an idea that can advance their initiative makes a big difference.   When you are genuinely curious and asking questions such as, “what are the effects of one approach over another” that allows them to think more deeply about their idea in a safe way, which is helpful.

4. Identify and Onboard Allies.  Identify potential allies of your project early on.  Categorize them as green (supportive) or yellow (open to persuasion but with questions).  At this stage, don’t go after the red (resistant or difficult to change).  When you bring people early on at the outset to join your planning team who feel like they also have a stake in the project, they are more likely going to assist you.  Seek additional sponsors and mentors who can enhance your credibility and social capital.

5. Identify Your Sequence-Sharing Strategy.  Plan the order in which you share information to maximize buy-in.  Every situation is different, but one can start with your manager’s support and gauge if the idea can work and gain more context.  You can ask questions to learn why anybody has not tried this before.  If it was attempted, why didn’t it work?  Through the discussions you can uncover additional pros and cons and field questions you might not have considered.  Then you can bring it to your team to get support to strengthen it even further, then think about the cross-functionals who would benefit from that problem being solved as well. As you continue to spread it to connections that are more distant, at least you have tested it and have initial support for it.

6. Anticipate concerns/rejections.   Sit with your team and anticipate rejections and responses to your initiative.  You can even bring up their concerns first before they do and address them.  If you’re unsure, you can ask chat GPT to steelman your arguments.  Once you get your team on board, you can work together to bring the ideas more widely having already strengthened them by defending them.

Wielding influence effectively hinges on more than just a moment of persuasion – it’s about cultivating trust, practicing empathy, and understanding the organizational ecosystem. By engaging with colleagues proactively, anticipating challenges, and thoughtfully mapping out communication strategies, you can navigate complex dynamics and secure the necessary buy-in. True influence is achieved through persistent and authentic connection, paving the way for collaborative success.

Quote of the day: One of the best ways to influence people is to make them feel important. Most people enjoy those rare moments when others make them feel important. It is one of the deepest human desires.
– Roy T. Bennett

How do you begin to build great relationships with others?  Comment and share with us; we would love to hear!

The next blog in this series 2/4 will focus on refined strategies for influencing. 

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with leaders to sharpen their influencing skills for win-win opportunities, contact me to explore this topic further.

What’s your intention to influence?

Dispelling Myths of Authenticity (Authenticity series 4/4)

In this final installment of our authenticity series, we confront prevalent misconceptions that often color our understanding of authenticity. Let’s unravel the truth behind these myths.

Myth #1 – Authetncity means never changing your personality

A misunderstanding with being authentic is thinking that we must always be true to ourselves and display that version.  But, which true self is that?  Walt Whitman said, “Do I contract myself?  Very well then, I contradict myself, I am large, I contain multitudes.”  To be authentically human is to exercise all our mini-selves, it does not mean resisting the evolution that occurs with personal growth.

New managers struggle when they define authenticity in strict terms.  When asked to make changes they may feel it is a stretch from their natural personality, and they equate that with inauthentic.  For example, a humble manager who values others’ ideas is told by their boss to be more assertive and sell their concept more aggressively.  That can feel fake.  Going against our natural inclinations can make us feel like impostors, so we tend to latch on to authenticity as an excuse for sticking with what’s familiar.  But as we advance in our careers, demands and expectations change, and we need to expand and develop new muscles and add more tools.   By viewing ourselves as works-in-progress and evolving our professional identities through trial and error, we can create a personal style that feels right to us and suits our organizations’ changing needs.  If we adhere too much to what we think and feel, it may counter what the situation demands, and we deprive ourselves of tremendous growth.  The aspects that are most challenging for us can teach us the most about leading effectively.  In an interview with Adam Grant, Indra Nooyi, Former CEO of PepsiCo shared advice that while you maintain your authenticity, do not expect others to accept 100% of who you are.  She talked about being the only female on executive calls, and all the men would talk about sports she did not follow.  The one sport she did follow, Cricket, nobody else was interested.  She decided to flex her authenticity and learn about other sports and get involved with sports talk with her coworkers before the meetings. She found that these efforts went a long way to building rapport and doing better business. Being able to bend to have stronger connections was quite valuable to her.

Myth #2: Authenticity gives you a free pass to behave however you want

Being authentic does not justify hurtful or self-centered and irresponsible behavior.  Some chronically uncivil people or those with disagreeable personalities like to say they are just being their authentic selves.  For example, you may yell at a teammate because you view yourself as prone to anger, but you do not have the right to unload your feelings on others whenever you want and in the way you want.  Family and friends may be able to handle that and will be there for us after sharing our short tantrums and emotional speedbumps.  You may be somebody who curses a lot and will want that same right in the workplace to express your authenticity.  But, we can be both authentic and respectful or agreeable to create harmony in the workplace.  Authentic leadership is about mastering the skill of being a shapeshifter.  Somebody can change styles depending on what the situation demands, without straying from core values and goals or relinquishing their genuineness.  It is not about the person who expresses themselves regardless of the impact they may have on others.  You must be mindful and emotionally aware of how your energy is radiating and how others are experiencing you.  

Myth #3: Authenticity means behaving the same way in every situation

We have a kaleidoscope of personalities and may activate specific personas under different conditions.  For example, when we are in performance mode, we present our most polished selves, showcasing our leadership prowess.  In learning mode, we experiment and accept failure as part of our growth journey. Authenticity can manifest differently in these varied contexts, and that’s perfectly normal.  Shakespeare’s famous words: “All the world’s a stage …and one man in his time plays many parts,” captures this reality.  Adapting your behavior to fit the situation does not make you fake or insincere; it demonstrates versatility.   Common sense says that we do not reveal every side of ourselves in every situation, but understand the context we are in and the style we can adapt because we have versatility.  You do not show up the same way in the board room when you give a briefing as you do with your family at a dinner party or the gym with your friends.  We have many facets, and while we are adapting to others, we are still always staying true to our values which is what authenticity is all about.

How do we know when you’re being inauthentic?  It happens when your actions diverge from your professed beliefs and values.  Like chameleons, leaders can adjust to better serve their teams while staying true to their authentic identities.

Quote of the day: "Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."  - Dr. Seuss (Theodor Seuss Geisel) (alternatively attributed to Sir Mark Young and/or Bernard Baruch)

Q: How do you adapt your style to fit the context you are in but are still authentic?  Comment and share below; we would love to hear from you!

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with leaders to explore what authentic leadership means to them and develop their style, contact me to explore this topic further.

Which myths do you want to dispel?

Grow Your Authentic Leadership (Authenticity series 3/4)

In the preceding blogs of this series, we explored authenticity and its characteristics.   This article will focus on ways we can be more authentic. 

Leadership is a canvas for self-expression, and attempting to replicate someone else’s style will likely lead to failure. Employees seek guidance from leaders who invest time in crafting their unique approach, those who are honest and unwavering in their message.  Fyodor Dostoyevsky wisely noted, “To go wrong in one’s own way is better than to go right in someone else’s.”  People yearn to be led by individuals who share an honest message deeply rooted in personal conviction, not borrowed words that lack a genuine connection.

Here are some practical steps you can take to cultivate greater authenticity:

1. Know your values.  Many of our woes come from not knowing ourselves, our abilities, fragilities, and virtues.  We walk through life as strangers to ourselves, and that can cause distress in our authenticity and leadership.  What are the top 3-5 beliefs that are important to you?  Some may not know the answer- is it love, money, status, or relationships?  We cannot align our behaviors with our values if we do not know them.  Knowing our values helps us make better decisions.  For example, if we value career goals, when we become a parent, we will know that we will want to make room for work because we will deliver our best selves to all that we do.  Sharing our values is sharing our truth.  Authenticity is intrinsically linked to your values and core beliefs, even if your behavior adapts to changing circumstances.

2. Know your purpose and align it with the organization.  Knowing what you are meant to do in this world is vital for fulfillment, so if we are working for an organization that does not represent who we are and what we stand for, it can be stifling.  But, when we can align any part of our purpose to the organizations, we can live more genuinely by being ourselves and having our values shine through in all places. 

3. Express yourself as a trait, not a role.  Often, we equate our identity with our job titles; if we do marketing for a living, that is how we portray ourselves, but it does not capture all we are.  Maybe we are a learner and conveyors of ideas so there are a lot of roles we could have, like a facilitator for people to mutually explore profoundly impactful ideas, or a professional speaker, or a teacher, or a team leader, or simply an optimist.  Authenticity is the expression of traits you have that can be flexed in different places rather than confined to specific roles.

4. Connect to your past.  Authenticity can find its roots in your origins.  Leaders who maintain a connection between their past experiences and their current selves are more often effective in building and maintaining relationships because they are not worried about hiding aspects of themselves.  Authentic leaders remain focused on where they are going but never lose sight of where they have come from.  Reflect on how your past has shaped you, and identify the common threads that have woven through your life.

5. Build a foundation of self-knowledge.  We can learn about ourselves in many ways, but the best approach is to solicit honest feedback—perhaps a 360-degree review—from coworkers and follow it up with coaching so we learn more about ourselves and how other people see us, and then we can see if the two views are compatible.  Combining personal and professional histories can unveil common themes from our upbringing and work experiences that have shaped our authenticity.   Spend time in introspection, understand your preferences, and explore how they have evolved over time. This self-knowledge serves as a strong foundation for authentic leadership.

Authenticity in leadership is a potent force for engendering trust and nurturing meaningful relationships. To further enhance your authenticity, delve deep into your purpose and values, self-reflect, and express yourself through inherent straight rather than predefined roles.

Quote of the day: “Know yourself, and you will win all battles.” -Lao Tzu, Chinese philosopher

Q: How can we become a more authentic leader?  Comment and share with us; we would love to hear!

The next blog in this series 4/4 will focus on dispelling myths of authenticity.

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with leaders to explore what authentic leadership means to them and develop their style, contact me to explore this topic further.

Which components would you include?

Characteristics of an Authentic Leader (Authenticity Series 2/4 )

In the previous blog, we delved into the concept of authenticity and its benefits in leadership.   This article will explore the key characteristics of being an authentic leader.

Here are a few traits of authentic leaders:

1. Vulnerability.  Authentic leaders are unafraid to share their thoughts, feelings, and experiences honestly. They willingly expose themselves to emotional challenges but do so without compromising their credibility.   For example, as a leader, you do not want to say to your team, “I want to do this job, but it’s scary, and I don’t know how.”  That candor can backfire, and you can lose trust with people who want and need a confident leader.  Instead, you can say, “I may not have all the answers, but I want to enlist your support as we move forward together.  That approach creates team cohesion and invites the active participation of others.

2. Integrity. This is when your words are consistent with your deeds; otherwise, followers will never accept you as authentic.  Great leaders embody their beliefs and live them unfailingly.  As Ralph Waldo Emerson puts it, “what you do speaks so loudly, I can’t hear what you’re saying.” Words are superficial and prove who you want to be, while actions show who you are.

3. Be transparent and truthful.  As Dostoyevsky wisely observed, “Above all do not lie to yourself, the man who lies to himself and listens to his own lie, comes to a point where he cannot distinguish the truth within him, or around him, so loses respect for himself and others.  And having no respect, he seizes to live.” People are more trusting when transparency and congruency of who you are on the inside are the same as how you portray yourself to the world; there is no secrecy or mystery.  When you operate with dishonesty, it can have a detrimental impact.  Nietzsche’s mentor, Ludwig Feuerbach said, “I would rather be a devil in alliance with the truth than an angel in alliance with falsehood.” Speaking truthfully allows for a more stress-free existence.

4. Self-awareness.  Authenticity begins with self-awareness: knowing who you are—your values, emotions, and competencies, as well as how others perceive them, are better equipped for success.  A study at the Center for Creative Leadership found that self-awareness is the primary quality that distinguishes successful leaders.  Moreover, research shows companies that employ professionals who exhibit high levels of self-awareness tend to perform better financially.  By looking inward and engaging in self-assessment, we can gain a deeper understanding of our emotions, beliefs, and strengths and improve our perception of those held by others. Regular reflection practice is important, whether through meditation, prayer, mindfulness, thinking, writing, or taking long walks to clear one’s head.  This allows us to step back from the whirlwind and set aside the preoccupation with task lists so the urgent does not take precedence over the important aspects of our lives.   Also, we can ensure alignment with our values and a deeper understanding of how we live our lives and engage with the world around us.  The more we know ourselves, the more authentic we can be.

5. Discipline.  Being an authentic leader requires more than just building self-awareness—we need to put it into practice, which requires discipline.  Making it a point to get feedback on our behaviors and being intentional about what we want to practice will help us.

6. Confidence and humility.  Having self-confidence and being comfortable in our skin are essential.  Knowing where we come from and who we are, and knowing how to use our backgrounds to build rapport with others. There is humility in connecting with all people.  Albert Einstein once said, “I speak to everyone in the same way, whether he is the garbageman or the university president.”  That statement reflects Einstein’s comfort with himself and his ability to be consistent in his various interactions.

7. Mission-driven & inspirational.  Knowing your deeply held crucibles and true north will help you stay on track so you can lead yourself authentically.  Similarly, a deep and abiding commitment to a company mission is integral to authentic leadership and business success.  According to a recent survey by EY and Harvard Business Review Analytic Services, 89% of executives said a sense of collective purpose drives employee engagement, and 84% said it leads to tremendous success in transformational efforts.  Some companies discover their mission early and others stumble upon it, but embracing a purpose will help with authenticity because it keeps you focused.  When you help your followers believe the mission is worthy, they will fight for you. 

6. Commitment to self-improvement.  To become more effective at motivating and guiding others, authentic leaders need to first focus on bettering themselves.  “Authentic leaders begin with the will and commitment within to work on themselves,” says Harvard Professor Nancy Koehn.  Abraham Maslow endorses the concept of individuals striving for self-actualization, which is becoming more complete by pursuing personal growth and peak experiences and realizing their potential. 

7. Balancing your internal understanding with your external feedback.  Leaders go on an inner journey of understanding who they are and what they believe and then matching that with their actions.  They also go on an outer trip, realizing that those actions have implications and will invite feedback from others.

We need a combination of listening to others’ opinions and having a strong enough understanding of who we are and what we want to be the final arbiters.  In Robert Keagan’s stages of adult development, self-authoring is about defining who we are, instead of listening to others’ descriptions of us.  We can distinguish the opinions of others from our thoughts and have an internal guide.  The next level of advancement is self-transforming - where your sense of self is not tied to a particular identity or role but is constantly created through exploration.  It is similar to the Buddhist concept of the evolving self.  In the words of E.E. Cummings “to be nobody but yourself in a world that is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else - means to fight the greatest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting.”  When you do not trust a leader it’s because there’s a gap between what they espouse and what they do.

Authentic Leadership means different things to different people.  While there are some common denominators, it is more about showing up in a way that lives your values and makes a positive difference in the lives of others.

Quotes of the day: “You can only find out what you actually believe (rather than what you think you believe) by watching how you act.” - Jordan Peterson

“Today you are you, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is youer than you. - Dr. Seuss

Q: What characteristics do you think are most important for developing your authenticity as a leader?  Comment and share with us, we would love to hear!

The next blog in this series 3/4 will focus on how to be an authentic leader. 

As a leadership development and executive coach, I work with leaders to explore what authentic leadership means to them and develop their style, contact me to explore this topic further.